


Princes Do Not Marry Vulcans

by softlyfeather



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Anastasia (1997) References, Inspired by Anastasia (1997), M/M, Tarsus IV references
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-05
Updated: 2019-03-05
Packaged: 2019-11-12 13:01:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,588
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18011390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/softlyfeather/pseuds/softlyfeather
Summary: just a fun anastasia spirk auJim is whisked off on a whirlwind adventure to find his family with the help of Spock and Bones.





	Princes Do Not Marry Vulcans

“Do you have to go?”

Winona pulled James onto her lap. “Yes, my dear.”

“But you’re the Queen, can’t you just order them to let me come with you?”

She smiled sadly, “Being Queen isn’t what it used to be. Besides, I have a duty to Starfleet as well. And we can’t go relapsing on our duties, can we?” She wiped a tear from his cheek. “Oh, I almost forgot!” Pulling a silver item from her pocket she placed it gently in his waiting hands. It was a small painstakingly detailed starship model. He turned it in his hands, admiring how the light glittered on its edges, “Wow! This is so cool!” 

“That’s not all,” she lay a thin chain over his head with a round pendant on it. Holding the pendant between his fingers he could see a Starfleet insignia engraved on it. His mother pointed at the top of the starship where there was a recessed circle that matched his necklace. Pressing the disc into the model, the nacelles lit up with a blue glow and a tinkling melody began to play. He recognized the Starfleet march immediately. “Something to help you sleep while I’m away. And perhaps by the time I’m back, you’ll be well on your way to joining me.”

Fixing his mother with his gaze, almost afraid to be hopeful, he asked, “Really?”

She grinned, “Really. When we get back to Terra, you can begin prep school for Starfleet.” 

He tackled her with a hug, “Thank you!” 

 

The screeching of the alarms jolted James awake. Red flashing lights indicated that the ship was under red alert. His mother burst into his quarters and took him by the arm, “We have to go, _now_ .” His hand reached out to his nightside table, grabbing the starship. 

She pulled him into the corridor and the other passengers on the USS Kelvin were quickly making their way to the escape pods. Families rushed past him, trying to stay together, jostling and pushing. He felt the model slip between his fingers and fall. “My starship!” he tried to pull his mother back, but she pushed onwards.

“We have to go, James.” He yanked his fingers from hers. It would only take a second…  “James!” But he was already fighting his way between the passengers. 

When he emerged from the crowd, he found the empty hall where he thought he’d dropped the ship, but the deck was clear. Walking a little further, he was about to turn a corner when he heard a strange zapping noise and metal pinging. Peering around the bulkhead he saw a tall figure with a furrowed brow. _A Klingon_ . They’d been boarded. 

James pressed himself against the wall, trying not to breathe too loudly. Someone gripped his arm and he nearly yelped. It was a boy who looked a bit older than him, wearing strange robes. He motioned James to follow him but didn’t let go of his arm. They snuck down the corridor and paused at junctions. The boy seemed to hear things James couldn’t. Taking one such moment to inspect his companion he saw that the boy had pointed ears and a strange haircut. _A Vulcan?_ He’d never seen one before. As if he knew he was being observed, the boys brown eyes met his, questioning. James swallowed and they continued towards the escape pods.

Before they could reach them, there were loud footsteps that even James couldn’t miss, coming down the next hall. The boy ran his fingers down the bulkhead and pressed into a small indent, a panel shifted to the side to reveal a small maintenance bunker. They maneuvered themselves into the small space and the boy pulled the panel back to conceal their hiding spot. James wondered how this boy knew so much about the ship they were on. 

The footsteps were getting closer and louder, the guttural sounds of Klingon echoing in the empty hall. James found he was holding his breath and felt a light squeeze on his arm from the boy. He still hadn’t let go. Though it was dark, the boy’s eyes shone in the faint light from the circuit boards surrounding them. The boy breathed in and out steadily, eyes never leaving James. _Ah_ . He mirrored the boy’s breathing, and without knowing why, moved the boy’s hand from his arm, into his hand, interlacing their fingers. The boy’s brows came together slightly and James squeezed his hand reassuringly. They breathed in sync, and James felt his heart stop pounding quite so hard in his chest. Even though the Klingons were right outside their hiding spot, James felt a calm radiating through him. Somehow he knew it was coming from the boy. Leaning his head down on the boy’s shoulder, they waited. Eventually the voices faded away and James moved their clasped hands towards the panel door in question. _Not yet_ , James felt the thought rather than heard it, but didn’t think much of it. He must have picked up on some movement the boy had made in response. 

Then things happened very quickly. An explosion rocked the ship and the boy burst into motion, ripping the panel away. He pulled James by his hand down the hall and towards one of the few escape pods left. Pressing James into the seat he fastened the harness faster than he’d thought it was possible for someone to move. The boy moved towards the other seat when a burst of light shot past him and struck the control board, causing sparks to fly. Pulling a phaser from his side- _where did he get that?_ \- the boy returned the approaching Klingon’s fire. He stepped from the pod and looked back at James briefly before hitting the red release button. 

“No!” James cried. The airlock closed between them. “Don’t leave m-“ his voice was torn from his mouth by the pod shooting away from the ship. The explosions continued to burst on the ship, looking like fireflies glimmering amongst the stars. Growing steadily smaller by the second. Blurring as the tears flooded his eyes. 

The pod began to shudder as it entered the atmosphere of whatever federation planet had been closest at the time of the pod’s departure. James felt his body crush against the harness repeatedly; these seats were not made for a child. Then his head slammed back against the bulkhead and everything went dark. 

 

****

The sun streamed into Spock’s office, lighting up the dust motes floating down towards the PADD he was staring at but not reading. On the screen was a news article proclaiming _Prince James Alive?_  There had been multiple instances over the years that the global media had ran this story. Always a new rumour or tip striking the hope that perhaps someone other than the Queen and a handful of others had survived. The King and elder prince had been found amongst the wreckage of the Kelvin. But there was no sign of the younger prince. Feeling the echo of a small hand in his, Spock shook his limb out. Perhaps he’d been sitting too long. The door chime was a welcome distraction. “Come.”

A slightly disheveled young man entered, the familiar frown already gracing his face. “Thank the stars this year is over. This last batch of cadets nearly killed me.”

“As you said last year, Doctor McCoy.”

“God, Spock, it’s been three years, you’d think you could call me Leonard by now. And this year it was true. Or do you not recall the incident with the slippery scalpel?” McCoy collapsed in the chair in front of his desk. 

“Eidetic memory. I remember even the things I should like to forget.” Spock glanced down at his hand again. 

“At least I can drink my pain away.” McCoy raised his brows as he saw Spock’s PADD lying on the desk. “I see you’ve heard then.”

“The usual rumours about Prince James’s survival? Yes.”

McCoy tutted. “I’m not sure they’re the usual hogwash. Might have some truth to them this time. Specific sightings up north. Even the Queen has offered a ridiculous amount of credits for information leading to him being found.”

“And this monetary sum intrigues you?”

“Hell, Spock, I’ve got Joanna to think about.”

“Your daughter.”

“It certainly would set up her future. And think of the Queen’s position with Starfleet, you could have any job you wanted.”

“Why are you approaching me with this matter?”

McCoy scoffed, “I was the court physician for years. I know the ins and outs of these people. And you were on the Kelvin for gods sake. Besides, with my charm, and your poker face, we could do anything. All we need to do is find an acceptable Prince James.”

“Vulcans do not lie, Doctor.”

“See! You’re perfect. And it’s Leonard.”

 

****

“The fish plant is down by the docks. It’s about time you got a job like everyone else on this planet- Jim, are you even listening?”

Jim waved to the kids upstairs, peering down at him from the window. He smiled to try and let them know it was going to be okay. 

Groaning, the older woman grabbed his arm and dragged him to the gates. “Still acting like the Queen of Sheba instead of the nameless no account you are.” 

“I have a family,” he protested.

“Yes, yes,” she mocked, pulling at his necklace. “In Starfleet, right? Do you even realize how many people are in Starfleet, how many _planets_  they’re on?”

Jim scuffed his feet, “Yes.”

With a cackle, the woman slammed the orphanage gates in his face, “Good luck with that, Jimmy.”

“It’s _Jim_ ,” he muttered at her back, clutching the pendant until he knew the insignia would be imprinted on his palm. 

Walking down the roadside, he kicked at the snow, watching the clumps fly through the air. _What does she know anyways, she's never even left Terra_ _._ Footsteps crunching, his feet felt heavy. A future at the fish plant was weighing them down. It was the last thing he wanted to do. 

The train station was empty when Jim walked in. It was still early and the snow had kept people indoors. Pulling his jacket tighter around himself, he scanned the message boards; they sure didn’t want to spend much on heating. The train leaving for the harbour would be here in a half hour. His eyes flicked down to the train times for San Francisco… for Starfleet Academy. _I could... No._  The odds of finding his family were slim. But… he couldn’t shake the feeling that he had to try. Sighing in exasperation he ran his hand through his hair. “Send me a sign, a hint… _anything_ ,” he pleaded to the silent building rafters. He flopped down on one of the benches and rested his forehead on his palms. _What should I do?_

Something brushed past his ankle and he peeked between his fingers to see a small black cat batting at his bootlaces. He smiled, “Hey, cut it out. I don’t have time to play. I’m waiting for a sign.” Scooping up the kitten, he stroked it, laughing as it batted at his necklace. It sniffed it intently and then stared deep into his eyes, head cocked to the side. _Oh shit. Well... that is a sign._  “A cat wants me to go to Starfleet.” He tucked the cat into his inner jacket pocket, next to his chest. “You must be cold, little guy. It’s a long train ride to Starfleet but I’ll keep you warm.”

He walked over to the ticket stations and selected his destination. The next screen asked him to scan his ID chip. “Damn it.” He should’ve known. Of course the job at the fish plant had been arranged under the table so that his lack of an ID chip hadn’t been an issue. 

Trudging back outside he patted the cat’s head through his jacket. “How are we going to get to Starfleet now, buddy?”

Someone cleared their throat to his right. A woman in a ratty shawl beckoned to him. “Did you say Starfleet?”

“I did, ya.”

“There are two men from Starfleet at the old palace, maybe they can help you?”

“Oh, thank you, maybe they can,” he waved his thanks and started towards the palace. Perhaps the universe was looking out for him after all. 

 

****

Spock was not certain why he had agreed to join Doctor McCoy. They sat at a table in an old theatre in the small northern town that the rumours of James had stemmed from. Viewing person after person who claimed to be, or at least look like, Prince James. Most were blond and blue eyed as the prince was known to be, but some were not even that. McCoy rubbed his brow in irritation. Clearly this endeavour was not going to be as easy as he had anticipated. Spock tried not to admit that a small part of himself had been hoping to find the real James. The one he had- He pushed the memory away. Dousing the spark of hope that he could still be alive. It was illogical to dwell on regrets and impossible possibilities. His hand found its way into his pocket and he ran his fingers ran over the memorized edges of a small starship model.

McCoy sighed loudly, “I thought for sure we’d find someone at least passable today. How hard can it be to find a blond haired, blue eyed man who looks vaguely royal?” 

“Evidently, quite.”

“Ya, ya, save your I told you so’s for later. Let’s get out of this flea-infested theatre and grab some food.”

They brought their take out into an old room in the palace. McCoy still remembered his way around from when he’d worked there. They’d lit a fire in the old hearth, to stave off the bitter cold. 

Just as he’d started in on his noodles, Spock heard a faint noise. _A voice?_ “Did you hear that?”

“Hmm?” McCoy barely looked up from his food. “I didn’t hear anything.”

Spock rose to investigate. 

 

****

Jim had wandered the perimeter of the palace but all of the entrances seemed to be boarded up. Perhaps the woman had been mistaken. A squirming in his pocket caused him to stop his search. “Sorry bud, you want to come out?” He put the cat on the ground and it wandered to one of the entrances, slipping between the boards. “Hey! Come back!” Jim peeked between the boards, seeing only darkness. “Damn it.” 

He managed to pry off enough boards to squeeze through, scraping by the rough old wood. Inside was warmer than outside, but only slightly. He opened his jacket and loosened his scarf. “Hello?” he called. “Anyone home?” His voice echoed in the large hall and he saw the cat near a doorway, scratching at the base. “There you are.” He opened the door and saw that it was at the top of a stairway which flowed down into a large open ballroom. The tables were covered in dust, but all the cutlery and plates were still sitting there untouched. Jim felt a strange feeling at the back of his mind. Warm and peculiar. “Like a memory from a dream…” he whispered to the cat at his feet. Despite how empty the room was, it felt full. Like the sensation of being held, safe and warm. Seeing the cat skid across the floor in the dust, he giggled, taking off his shoes and skating across the floor in his socks. He was doing a little spin when he heard the voice. 

“Sir. You can’t be here.” _Shit_ . He grabbed his boots and ran up the stairs. The man was right behind him. _He's fast_ . Whirling at the top of the stairs, he clenched his fists. He could fight if he had to; it wouldn’t be anything new. 

****

The man spun around, eyes flashing with fear. Spock felt like he’d been punched in the gut. Those eyes. Bright blue and scared, staring at him from the escape pod as he’d hit the release. _No_ . There was no way. 

McCoy finally caught up with them, “Spock, what’s going on?” He glanced up at the man and did a double take. “Holy shit. Spock, do you see what I see?” Spock raised a brow. “Spock, he’s the spitting image…” He raised his voice slightly, filling it with warmth to show they meant no harm, “You there, what’s your name?”

The man’s eyes narrowed, “It’s Jim. And you are?”

“Leonard McCoy, Spock,” McCoy pointed at himself and then Spock. “Got a last name to go along with that?” 

Jim laughed without humour. “Funny story. No, actually.”

Spock found his voice, “You do not know your surname?”

The man relaxed slightly, though he still seemed ready to run. “This is going to sound crazy, but I can’t remember anything from before I was eight. No family. No nothing.” 

“That’s… perfect,” McCoy muttered with a smile to Spock.

Jim looked between them, “You two wouldn’t happen to be from Starfleet would you?” 

McCoy smirked, “Depends on who’s asking,” he replied at the same time as Spock said, “Yes.” 

Jim laughed. “Well, I was hoping you could help me. I want to get to San Francisco and I don’t have an ID chip to get train tickets.” 

“You are going to San Francisco?” Spock did not believe in fate, but this was quite the coincidence. 

“I think my family is there,” Jim played with his necklace. “Starfleet is the only clue I have.”

“We can help you,” Spock offered. Jim gave him a small smile and Spock felt a warm shiver run down his spine. 

“We do have tickets, shuttle tickets in fact, but unfortunately, they are for Prince James,” McCoy threw a look at Spock that he was sure was meant to communicate that he should play along. 

“Prince James?” Jim asked.

McCoy gestured at the painting behind Jim. It was a portrait of the royal family. King George, Queen Winona and their sons, Sam and James. “The Queen is looking for her long lost son, and we are going to find him and reunite them.” He cocked his head, “You know, Jim, you do kind of resemble him.”

“I’m sorry, you think _I_   look like Prince James?” he looked incredulous. 

McCoy shot Spock another look. _Alright_ . “You have blue eyes.” 

The doctor raised a brow as if to say ‘really?’ but steamed ahead, “Right, the Kirk eyes!” 

“George’s smile,” Spock added. 

“You’re the right age, the right physical type,” McCoy continued.

“Oh, come on you guys,” Jim seemed less sure of himself now. 

“Trust me, we have seen a lot of men, and none of them look as much like Prince James as you do,” McCoy ended firmly. 

Jim looked to Spock as if for guidance. Spock clasped his hands behind his back and collected himself. “You say you do not know what happened in your past — no one knows what happened to Prince James. You say you are looking for your family at Starfleet — Prince James’s only living relative is with Starfleet. It is logical that you would join us.”

“But,” McCoy interrupted, “As we said, the ticket we have is for Prince James. So as much as we’d love to help…” He put his arm around Spock’s shoulders and led him away. Tossing a “Good luck though,” over his shoulder. 

“What are you doing Doctor? He appeared to be about to join us.”

“Trust me, I’ve got it under control.” They stepped away slowly.

 

****

_A Prince?_ There was no way. But looking at the painting before him, there was no denying the resemblance. The small boy in the painting stared at him with sad eyes. Who was Prince James but another lost child? Every lost child should have a chance to find their home. It couldn’t hurt to try right? And he liked these two Starfleet officers. They were strange, but familiar at the same time. Especially the Vulcan. Taking a breath and standing up straight he decided. Black cat in hand, he chased after them, “McCoy, Spock, wait up!”

McCoy turned nonchalantly, “You called?”

“If I don’t remember my past, then who’s to say I’m not a Prince or a Duke or whatever he is. And if I’m not Prince James, the Queen will certainly know right away and it’s all just an honest mistake.” 

“And if you are the Prince, then you’ll know who you are and have your family back,” McCoy smiled charmingly. 

“Either way you will get to San Francisco,” Spock added.

“Right!” Jim reached out to shake Spock’s hand but he just stared at him, making no move to take his hand. With a confused look Jim turned his hand to McCoy who shook it heartily. 

Jim cuddled the cat, “We’re going to Starfleet, kitty, just like you wanted.”

“The cat’s not coming,” McCoy pointed at it.

“The cat’s coming.”

“What is the cat’s name?” Spock asked.

“Pooka,” Jim decided on the spot. Spock reached out to scratch Pooka’s chin and Jim forgave him for the missed handshake. 

McCoy rolled his eyes and led the way, “Come on, we’ve got a shuttle to catch.”

 

****

“Your highness,” McCoy bowed mockingly as Jim got on the shuttle. Jim smacked him lightly on the head as he passed. Spock watched a mechanic working on the side of the shuttle give them a curious look. 

Waiting until Jim had entered the passenger lounge, Spock pulled McCoy aside. “Perhaps it would be prudent to not be conspicuous about with whom we travel.” 

McCoy sighed, “You’re probably right. As usual.”

 

The shuttle they were taking was private, but very run down. The trip was going to take almost a full day instead of the usual hour. But with Jim not having an ID chip, they didn’t have a lot of options. The passenger lounge was cramped as most of the shuttle was being used for cargo. Spock wasn’t even sure this would classify as a passenger lounge on most shuttles. It was two small hard benches, next to a tiny window. McCoy sat on one side with their bags and Spock sat next to Jim on the other. With that peculiar cat sense for those who like them least, Pooka had decided to curl up next to McCoy. 

The shuttle shuddered as it took off and Jim fiddled with his necklace pendant, slouching in his seat and biting his lip. Spock was not sure how to make him less nervous. Perhaps with a distraction? “A Prince should strive for good posture at all times. They are on constant display and should not be seen to fidget.” 

Jim turned those brilliant blue eyes on him in amusement. “And how is it you know what Princes do and don’t do?”

“I know many things about various subjects.”

“I see.”

“I am simply trying to help.”

“Spock?”

“Yes.”

“Do you really think I’m royalty?” 

Spock wasn’t sure why he felt like he couldn’t breathe when Jim looked at him. “I cannot deny that possibility.”

Jim leaned in even closer, “Then stop bossing me around.” Crossing his arms with a mock huff, he looked out the window. 

McCoy laughed gruffly, “He certainly acts like a royal ass.”

 

Later, McCoy had left to try and find a replicator so they could eat and Spock found himself watching Jim. He’d calmed down now that the shuttle was flying smoothly. He felt a strange need to ensure Jim was alright. “I did not mean to criticize you earlier.”

Jim waved his hand in dismissal, “Don’t worry about it.” They sat in silence for a moment. “Do you miss Vulcan?”

Spock jarred at the incongruent topic, but considered his reply. “Not often.”

“But it was your home.”

“It was a place I once lived.”

“Is Starfleet your home then?”

Spock felt his brows come together, “I do not understand the human preoccupation with the idea of home.” 

“Isn’t it something every person wants? I wouldn’t think you’d need to be human to want somewhere to belong.” Jim looked much younger in that moment. Lost. Spock felt a strange ache in his chest. 

“And where does a person belong?” he asked.

Jim shrugged. “I figure with their family is a good place to start. That’s what I’m starting with anyways.” The ache increased. Family… belonging. They were things Spock had actively tried to not think about for years. He pushed them away instinctively.

Sometime later, Jim had fallen asleep, wrapped in his jacket and leaning on the window when Spock felt a change in the vibrations from the shuttle. Something wasn’t right. He was nudging Jim’s arm gently when McCoy returned looking worried. 

“Spock, I think something’s wrong with the shuttle.” 

Jim woke almost instantaneously and was on his feet, pulling his jacket on. Pooka tucked into the inside pocket. “What can I do?” 

Spock and McCoy glanced at each other. “Stay here,” McCoy ordered. They made their way to the engine room, not bothering to make sure Jim obeyed. 

The small engine was red hot and components were visibly melting. “Christ, it’s hotter than Satan’s bowels in here.” McCoy’s vernacular, though colourful, was surprisingly accurate at times. Spock scanned the machinery and found where a coolant valve had been soldered shut. 

“Hand me a wrench,” he asked the doctor. A wrench was placed in his hands almost instantaneously. Surprised, he turned to see Jim. “Not you.”

Jim gave him a wry look and glanced over to where McCoy had passed out from the heat. “McCoy’s busy at the moment.” Spock wondered momentarily why Jim wasn’t as bothered by the heat, but went to work turning the valve. When it finally released, Spock realized- “The engine’s too overheated for the coolant to work now.” He looked at Jim in surprise.

“How…?”

Jim shrugged, “I read a lot.”

But he was correct. They would need to leave the ship. Now. 

They scanned the cargo hold for something, anything that would help slow the ship down so they could get out. “Uh, what about this?” Jim was pointing at a large old boat anchor. 

Spock raised his brows, but… “That should work.” They crouched side by side, pushing the heavy metal out the side door of the shuttle. Thankfully they were over a forested area and not a populated region. Once it passed the lip, it fell quickly. Spock hadn’t realized that one of his hands was in the centre of a loop of chain that was about to be pulled over until Jim shouted and grabbed his hand, pulling it away from the chain just as it tightened and flew out the door. Spock felt a strange sensation, but it passed too quickly to identify as they braced themselves against either side of the door for the inevitable jolt. The shuttle shook and fishtailed briefly as it slowed. Jim’s face went white for a moment, his eyes wide before he collected himself. 

“What on earth are we doing now?” McCoy had woken up.

“We will need to jump,” Spock informed him.

“We need to _what now_ ?”

“Come on,” Jim grabbed his arm and they lined up at the door. They were still a fair distance from the ground and the shuttle was careening forwards, though slower than before.

“Tuck and roll,” Spock advised.

“If I break every goddamn bone in my body, I’m holding you responsible,” McCoy glared. Spock nodded, and they jumped.

 

****

It was painful. Jim knew he’d have bruises all over from this adventure. Pooka thankfully was still curled in his pocket, though anxious to come out. He looked over to see Spock already standing. Clearly Vulcans were a bit more resilient than humans. 

McCoy was wincing as he sat up, “I hate shuttles, I’m never getting on a shuttle again.”

“How’re your bones?” Jim asked.

“Seem to be intact,” McCoy gave him a dark look. “For now.”

Jim grinned, “Bones. That’s a good nickname.”

McCoy glanced upwards, “Lord, give me patience.” Which only made Jim laugh harder.

 

“Are we going to walk all the way to San Francisco?” Jim whined.

“We are going to walk to Petaluma, and then we will take a bus,” Spock informed him.

“Ah, a bus,” Jim replied dreamily as they trudged down the dirt road. The shuttle had taken them over a rural stretch of land and they weren’t likely to encounter civilization for a while. 

McCoy, newly minted ‘Bones’, had wandered over to an old homestead to ask about supplies. Spock had offered but, “Are you kidding, they’ve probably never seen a Vulcan in person, don’t want to give them a heart attack before we can even speak to them.”

Jim was admiring the way the sun was causing the leaves above them to glow a vibrant green and almost shimmer when the wind caught them. There was no snow here and the air felt pleasant enough that he had taken off his jacket. 

He turned to comment how nice this was only to see Spock with his head tilted in thought. A questioning glance was all the prompting he needed. “You did not react as I would expect to seeing a Vulcan for the first time.”

Jim laughed dryly, “That’s because it wasn’t my first time.” Spock’s incredulous look, though subtle, was worth it. “I was found on Vulcan.” He felt the smile fade from his eyes. “Wandering around in the desert alone. No idea how I’d gotten there. On the verge of heat exhaustion. It was dumb luck that I stumbled into a town.”

“How long did you remain on Vulcan?”

“About five years.” Jim ran his hand through his hair. “A few families shared responsibility of taking care of me.”

“That explains why the heat of the engine did not affect you as it did Doctor McCoy.”

“There’s no heat quite like Vulcan.”

Spock’s eyes crinkled slightly at the edges, “Indeed. Where did you go after Vulcan?”

“Well it wasn’t really go, as much as sent. They figured I’d be better off in a human colony.”

“That seems logical.”

Jim paused, watching Pooka chase a bug. He didn’t usually tell this part of his story. Ever. To anyone. There were too many memories attached to it. Too much pain. But looking at Spock… somehow he knew that if there was anyone he could tell, it was him. “… they sent me to Tarsus IV.”

There was almost no reaction but Jim felt like he was beginning to see the small indications of the thoughts and emotions running beneath the surface of his companion. There was no pity in his eyes, just regret and perhaps, admiration? “You are a survivor.” It was a statement, an observation. 

Jim scoffed to cover the old pain, “I guess I am. Not sure why though. I’m nobody special.”

The softness in Spock’s voice caused him to look up, “I believe it to be quite the opposite, Jim.” He swallowed and a crashing through the bushes broke the moment. 

“I’m not sure if that man has ever ventured into polite society but at least he gave us some bread.” McCoy roughly handed them each a large chunk of ripped bread loaf and they accepted without words. He looked between them, “Did I miss something?” Jim shook his head and started to swagger back down the road. “Fine, don’t tell me. But we need to work on your walk.”

“My walk?” Jim’s face was scrunched up when he looked back.

McCoy gestured to a fallen log by the side of the road. “Up you get. Royalty do not walk, they float.”

“Because they’re full of hot air?” Jim thought he might have heard Spock sniff in amusement.

McCoy rolled his eyes, “Back straight, head held high, and smooth steps. None of this caveman strut you’ve got going on.” As much as he was playing it up, Jim loved a challenge. With Pooka balanced on his shoulder, he imagined he was walking on clouds, and did his best to float to the end of the log. “Much better.” Jim hopped off. “You’ll also meet important people,” he gestured to Spock obviously wanting them to act it out, “and you’ll need to bow.”

Jim swept a low bow before Spock, adding a flourish for fun. “How do you do, my liege.” 

“Depending on their customs, they might take your hand,” McCoy continued to dictate.  Spock took Jim’s hand. “And kiss it.” Spock pressed his lips to the back of his hand and Jim’s eyes went wide. He knew how particular Vulcans were about _hands_ . Looking down he saw a green tinge across Spock’s cheeks and nose. A warmth spread through his chest at the sight as Spock dropped his hand. 

McCoy seemed not to have noticed and was walking ahead, “Uncle Boris was from…?”

Jim cleared his throat, “Moscow.” He followed his companions down the road, finding his eyes drawn to Spock’s back more than once. 

 

The next town they came upon had a riverboat that could take them further, faster than walking which Jim was more than grateful for. Even McCoy seemed to be frowning a bit less at the idea. They left Jim to settle in on the boat while they went to find some dinner.

Jim had just drifted off on the bottom bunk in their shared cabin when Spock returned carrying a large box. He sat up, gently removing Pooka from his chest and placing her down into the blankets. “What’s that?”

“It is for you.”

Jim raised a brow, taking the box and lifting the lid. Inside was a very nice set of dark clothes. He ran his hand over the fabric feeling how soft and well made it was. He couldn’t remember having something this nice before that wasn’t a hand-me-down. It felt hard to breathe. He struggled to meet Spock’s eyes, “I’ll pay you back for these.”

“There is no need. They are a gift.”

Jim smiled softly. He wasn’t sure there was any way of accurately conveying what this meant to him. Words would have to be enough. “Thank you.”

Spock nodded and departed the room. Jim pulled off his old worn clothing and slipped into the black long sleeved shirt and dress pants. He felt like a new person. 

They ate dinner together on the deck and then one of the crew members started playing a fiddle, another a small drum. There were a few other passengers on board who began to dance and McCoy raised his brows at Jim. “Well, this is as good a time as any to learn to dance.”

“Oh come on, Bones, I know how to dance.” McCoy did not appear to believe him. Jim groaned and got up, waving his arms in time with the beat and rotating his hips wildly. 

“Good god Jim,” McCoy jumped up, grabbing him by the shoulders to stop his movement. “That is _not_  how a royal dances.”

Jim crossed his arms, “Let me guess, they _float_ across the dance floor?” 

“Yes, and with a lot less hips poking people’s eyes out.” He gestured at Spock, “Get over here, you’re more graceful than I am.” Spock met Jim’s eyes and he felt his stomach flip. He stood slowly and joined them. “Alright, you put your hands here, and here,” McCoy positioned them like they were mannequins. 

“Doc- Leonard,” Spock corrected at the glare from McCoy. “If Jim would place his hand on my wrist rather than my bare hand, that would be preferable.”

“Shit, right, I always forget about the Vulcan hand thing.” McCoy’s cheeks darkened slightly as he perhaps remembered the whole hand kissing incident from earlier. 

Jim wrapped his hand around Spock’s covered wrist wondering why he was fine with touching and even kissing his hand earlier if this was too much. Maybe it had to do with duration. McCoy began to count and signalled them to begin. They instantly stepped on each others toes. 

McCoy groaned, “No, no, let Spock lead until you pick up the steps. Then we’ll switch roles.”

They reset and Jim tried to relax and let Spock lead him. He quickly had to admit, the Vulcan was a very competent dancer. Knowing that dancing was not a common activity on Vulcan he had to wonder where Spock had picked up this particular skill. With no where else to look, he was forced to look into Spock’s eyes. They were a pleasant warm brown. Surprisingly friendly given his usual relatively blank expressions. But even those were deceiving. There was emotion and feeling if you just knew what to look for. Right now his face was soft, concentration and intelligence apparent in his eyes, but his bowed lips were relaxed. Jim certainly felt like he was floating now. “Thank you again for the clothes.”

A slight upturn at the corner of his lips, “You look… pleasing.” 

Jim felt his cheeks heat. “I’m feeling a little dizzy.” 

“Light headed?” Spock asked, concern in his brows. Jim nodded. “I find I am experiencing a similar sensation. It is most likely from the spinning. Perhaps we should stop.”

Jim realized at that moment, “We already have.” They were still. The music seemed distant and the warm air felt as though it held them.

 

****

Jim’s eyes were particularly blue right now. Spock found he couldn’t focus on anything else. It was a foreign sensation as he was used to being able to concentrate on multiple tasks at once. His eyes seemed to pull him in, their depths begging to be explored. Jim’s lashes fluttered and Spock felt a similar response near his navel. He wasn’t sure if Jim had moved closer or if he had, but their faces were mere inches apart. Jim’s lips appeared especially plush. He found himself having the illogical thought that he should like to know what they would feel like pressed to his own. It was then that two of Jim’s fingers slid from his sleeve to his bare wrist, stroking over his pulse. A wave of emotion and strange familiarity filled him. The shock of it caused him to pull away. Confusion, and perhaps disappointment, brushed over Jim’s face. “You are doing fine,” Spock departed the deck. He needed to meditate. 

Neither of them noticed McCoy leaning on the railing, rubbing his fingers over his brow grumbling, “I never should’ve let them dance.”

 

That night Spock woke to Pooka batting at his arm, meowing insistently. “Pooka?” His gaze fell to the empty bunk that Jim should be in and he felt irrational fear grip him. After making sure Pooka was secure in their cabin with McCoy still snoring away, he quickly went up to the deck. The moon was full and lit a lone figure standing with hands braced on the railing. Shoulders shaking as tears streaked his face, Jim stared out over the water. Spock was unsure if he should approach. Would Jim want company or did he wish to be alone? Jim lifted one hand to his brow and sobbed lightly. Spock felt a splintering in his chest; his whole body ached to be near Jim. Giving in, he cleared his throat softly before laying a gentle hand on Jim’s shoulder as to not startle him. “Jim?”

Turning to Spock, his resolve seemed to melt, “Oh Spock.” His voice cracked, “I keep seeing faces, so many faces.” His hand clutched at Spock’s shirt and Spock gathered him into his arms. 

“It was just a nightmare, Jim.” He held him as his mother had when he was young. Hand running over his hair, rocking him slightly as Jim’s arms tightened around him. Spock felt vague impressions of the visions that haunted Jim. He had experienced so much death for someone his age. No one was around for long. They either left him or died. Nothing was permanent. And forever, those demons chased after him. Guilt that he couldn’t save more people, and fear that he would forever be alone. No family. Belonging nowhere. Though it was illogical that words could fix anything Spock wanted to say them regardless. “It is alright. You are safe now.” 

He was not sure how long they stood there, swaying in the moonlight. It seemed that when it came to Jim, his mental faculties were at a disadvantage. 

 

****

The next day, after a short bus ride, they were finally in San Francisco. The buildings shone, and it seemed to Jim as though the city were made of precious metals. He played with the pendant around his neck, feeling closer to finding the truth than ever. 

“Alright, we have a meeting with Pike in an hour,” McCoy informed them as he finished a comm call. 

“Wait,” Jim held his hands out. “You didn’t say anything about a ‘Pike’. I thought we were seeing the Queen.”

McCoy and Spock glanced at each other sheepishly. Jim couldn’t even bring himself to look at Spock. McCoy tried to explain, “Look, no one sees the Queen without convincing Pike first. He’s one of the Queen’s closest confidants. Spock worked with him for a while, he can tell you.”

Spock added, “He is a good man, Jim. This is just one more step in your journey.”

Jim sighed, “Fine. Let’s just get this over with.”

 

Pike turned out to be Christopher Pike, who was also a Captain with Starfleet. Somehow this made Jim feel better about him. His home was large and much nicer than Jim was used to being in. Though if he was royal he figured he’d better not let that show. 

Pike was welcoming and offered them all tea as they entered. He smiled at Jim as though they’d been friends for years. Jim liked that. It made the interrogation a lot more comfortable than it should’ve been. Pooka curled up next to him helped as well. The questions were easy and it was clear that McCoy and Spock had done an excellent job of preparing him. 

“Now, you’ll excuse me if you find this an impertinent question,” Pike set down his teacup, “But I have to know. How did you escape the Kelvin?”

It wasn’t something McCoy or Spock had ever mentioned but Jim felt the memory rising to the surface anyways. Faint and hazy, but present nonetheless. 

“There… there was a boy. A Vulcan. He opened a wall…” Jim trailed off, shaking his head to clear it. “I’m sorry, I’m sure that sounds crazy.” 

He found Pike’s eyes following Spock as he left the room, before he looked back to him, that smile still in place. “You did perfectly.”

 

****

_There was a boy... a Vulcan..._ Spock felt his whole world shift. _No_ . It was impossible. His eyes flew to Jim’s back, perfectly straight as he sat on the sofa before Pike. Jim couldn’t be… James. _His James_ . The James he’d pushed into the pod and shot off into space. Knowing the damage that had been done to the control panel. Knowing that it was still his best chance. To never hear from him again. Convinced that he’d pushed him to his death. He couldn’t breathe. He left the house and went to the garden. 

It wasn’t long before McCoy joined him, fist pumping. “We did it, Spock! The Queen isn’t seeing anyone anymore but Pike got us tickets to the ballet tonight and she’ll be there. It couldn’t have gone more perfectly.”

Spock sat on a bench beneath a blossoming tree, gazing up into the petals. “That is because he is the prince.”

“Right? _I_   just about believed him,” McCoy laughed.

“No, you do not understand,” Spock tried but Pike was coming outside with Jim stating that they were going to need to buy Jim a fancy suit if they were going to the ballet. 

Jim’s wide smile was contagious for everyone but Spock. He could see the quiet question in Jim’s eyes but had no answer for it. 

 

****

They were whisked off to the shops with Pike and he insisted on taking Jim to his personal tailor to be fitted. Spock and Bones went off to find evening wear of their own. 

The tailor made his way around Jim’s appendages, taking measurements and jotting them down in his little notebook. Pike sat down on the sofa next to the mirrors in front of Jim. “So, son, you have some interesting travel companions. They wouldn’t be my first pick for rescuers of the lost Prince James.”

Jim smiled, “They’re good men. I’m sure they make excellent officers.”

“I’ve heard good things about McCoy. Spock I’ve worked with previously. Though, I have to admit, I’ve seen more emotion on his face in the last hour than I ever did in his two years as my first officer.” 

Jim wasn’t sure what Pike was asking him. “Sir?”

“He’s wary about showing his mixed heritage.” He held up a hand to stop Jim from interrupting him, “Not that there’s anything wrong with it. But he does try very hard to be… Vulcan. Seeing him express his human side a bit more… well, it’s heartening. I think it will only make him a better officer. And he’s already the best in the fleet.” He narrowed his eyes at Jim in thought, “Have you thought of enlisting?”

Jim was still processing the fact that Spock was part human and the question threw him. “Enlisting?”

“In Starfleet.”

His heart beat faster. “I’d love t-”, he stopped. Could he join Starfleet if he was the prince? Wouldn’t he have other duties? He wasn’t sure. 

Pike nodded as if he understood. “It’s something to think about anyways. You and Spock would make a good team.”

“Really?” Jim pictured himself on a starship with Spock. The idea felt right. Like that was what this was all leading to. Jim paused, he thought Pike might be the best person to ask. “Do you know… Did they ever find out what happened on the Kelvin?”

Pike sighed, “They did a ‘thorough’ investigation but the only conclusion they came to was that the Klingons were tipped off about the Kelvin’s position. But they never found out where the tip came from… other than that it originated on Terra.” 

“A terrorist group?” Jim wondered.

Pike gave him an evaluating look, “There were rumours, _rumours_  mind you, that it came from someone close to the crown.” Jim’s eyes widened. “There weren’t many who knew the royal family was all on one ship. The list of suspects isn’t as long as one would think. So… if this all works out, you’re going to want to watch your back, son.”

Jim nodded, glad that Pike trusted him enough to tell him.

 

They went out for dinner together and there was a dance floor that some couples were waltzing on. After they’d eaten Jim asked Spock to join him but he’d declined, trying to ignore the hurt look on Jim’s face. A woman from a nearby table practically jumped up when he asked her. Spock watched them twirl and had trouble pushing away the memories from the riverboat. 

It was still hard to believe that he’d found him. It had all been an exercise in futility when McCoy had first approached him. The odds of finding the lost Prince James that most believed was dead… Spock knew numbers. And these were astronomical. And yet… there he was. Gracefully carrying himself across the floor as if he’d been born to it. Which, Spock reminded himself, he was. Jim would meet the Queen tonight. No more pretending, Jim would be gone soon… this was the end. Jim tried to meet his eyes again, smile gleaming, but all Spock could do was stare at the table. 

As they left the restaurant Spock felt a tug at his chest. Looking down he saw that Jim had found a rose from somewhere and had tucked the blossom into his suit. He nodded at him in thanks, surprised Jim had bothered after he had refused his offer to dance.

 

Spock sat on the steps of the theatre as McCoy paced in front of him. They were waiting on Jim and Pike who had travelled separately. “There is nothing to be nervous about, Doctor. He is the prince.”

“Leonard. And yes, I know,” he waved a hand dismissively. 

“No. You do not know,” Spock said firmly and McCoy finally looked at him seriously. Spock took a breath. “I was the boy. The one who opened the wall. We hid until the Klingons had passed and then I ensured he left in an escape pod.”

McCoy looked shocked. “But… that means that our Jim really has found his family. He is the heir to the throne… and you….”

“ _We_  will go back to Starfleet,” Spock rose.

“But I’ve seen the two of you-” 

Spock turned and interrupted him, “Princes do not marry Vulcans.” 

McCoy wasn’t going to give up, “You’ve got to tell him.”

“Tell me what?” They both turned to see Jim coming up the stairs. He had a black overcoat covering his suit, but his hair had been styled so that it was no longer falling into his face. His eyes bright with excitement and nerves. 

“How wonderful you look,” Spock attempted to cover for McCoy’s comment.

Jim smiled brilliantly and Spock had to remind himself to breathe. 

 

They entered the ballet hall and the doorman took their coats. Spock entered the door after Jim and when he looked up the velvet lined stairs to see Jim at the top looking back at him… everything else faded away. Jim’s suit was a deep blue. The blue of space, so dark it was almost black but for the glow of the stars. And Jim was glimmering. The fabric had some sort of thread woven in that caught the light and ignited small sparkles all over. The contrast of the darkness set his eyes and hair alight. Jim was the beauty of space personified. Once again Spock was unsure of the passage of time. Perhaps it had been mere seconds but it felt like an age when McCoy appeared at his side and coughed pointedly, elbowing his side.

They took their seats and McCoy pointed out where the Queen was sitting, in a high box to their left. Jim whispered but Spock’s Vulcan hearing caught it, “Please let her remember me…” His chest ached in a way he couldn’t explain.

The ballet passed quickly, the dancers were excellent and the orchestra was one of the best Spock had heard in a long time. Glancing over at Jim he saw that he had twisted his program repeatedly in his white gloved hands and was now in the process of tearing it into increasingly smaller pieces as he watched the dancers, jaw tight. Spock lay his hand on Jim’s arm, squeezing it through the fabric, he leaned over to whisper in Jim’s ear, “Everything is going to be fine.” Grateful blue eyes met his, and Jim let out a breath. Turning back to watch the remainder of the show, Jim took Spock’s hand off his arm and placed it in his, intertwining their fingers. Spock froze. Did he remember? But Jim was content, watching the dancers spin. Thumb rubbing absently over his. He sank into the feeling, allowing himself this small pleasure before it was all over. 

All too soon, the performance was done and Jim was pulling his hand away to clap. 

Spock led Jim towards the door to the Queen’s box, hesitating when they finally reached it. “Spock?”

“Yes?” he turned with relief.

“We’ve been through a lot together,” Jim stepped closer, eyes staring into his. 

“Indeed.”

“I just wanted to say…” he trailed off, biting his lip.

“Yes?”

“… thank you, I guess.”

“Ah.” Spock turned back to knock on the door but felt the urge to speak. “Jim?”

“Yes?” his face was so hopeful.

But Spock couldn’t find the courage to say the words he wanted to. There was scarce mathematical probability of things going well if he did. “… good luck.”

Jim’s face fell slightly, “Thanks.”

Spock knocked on the door and Pike answered. They made a show of announcing that the prince had been found, but it seemed Winona was not having any of it. 

“I will not be seeing any more men claiming to be my son,” she came from behind the curtain, looking formidable. 

“Please, your highness, if you will just speak with him for a moment, I’m sure you will see-” Spock tried.

“No. Do you think I don’t know this ploy? I never should have offered that reward, money always does bring out the worst in people. I’ve seen enough James Kirk’s to last me a lifetime. You should be ashamed of yourself, a Starfleet officer stooping to such levels. Is the pay really not what it used to be for first officers?”

Pike stepped in, apologizing again. “I’m sorry your highness, I really thought we’d found him this time.”

“Just get him out of here,” Winona waved at Spock. 

Pike turned to him with an apology written on his face, mouth crooked. “You’d better go.”

****

_I never should have offered that reward, money always does bring out the worst in people..._ The raised voices snuck out the ajar door and Jim’s mouth turned to ash. They hadn’t been trying to find the lost prince, they’d be after the reward. They’d never believed he was James. His heart broke and he turned away in pain. To have come so close to knowing where he was from only to lose it all. And to people he’d trusted. He’d thought they’d cared about him. Especially-

“Jim?”

He whirled on Spock, “It was all a lie, wasn’t it?”

“No-”

“You _used_ me. The whole time, I was just part of your plan to get reward money?”

“No, Jim, it may have started that way, but the circumstances have changed now that you really are the prince-”

“Oh stop it, Spock. From the very beginning, you _lied_. And I _believed_  you. I can’t believe I actually thought that we-”, he groaned, throwing up his hands.

“Please, Jim,” he reached out to grab Jim’s sleeve. “The Vulcan boy you remembered, who opened the wall, that was-”

“I don’t care what I said I remembered, ok? I was probably just remembering something from Vulcan. None of this is real anymore. I’m still just the same old nobody, with no past and no family,” he could feel the tears welling in his eyes. “Please, Spock, I just want to be alone.”

Spock let go of his sleeve and he ran down the stairs.

 

****

As Jim left Spock felt broken. Jim had to know the truth. There had to be a way to make it happen. He straightened his suit jacket and executed a plan.

Sneaking into the driver’s seat of the Queen’s cab was easier than expected and he made a note in his mind to discuss improved security with her once this was all over. She was sharp and noticed the difference in driving style almost immediately, and yet handled the situation with a deadly calm. “Spock, I hope you know what you are doing. You could lose a lot more than just your position in Starfleet if you do not let me go.”

“I have no intention of holding you prisoner. I will only ensure you speak with him, and then you may do as you wish.”

They pulled up outside Pike’s residence and Spock opened the door for Winona. She refused to move. Spock knelt so that he was at her level. “Your highness, I know you have been hurt. But is there not a possibility that he has been just as lost and alone as you have been?” She looked at him with wariness in her eyes. He reached into his pocket and pulled out the starship. The one he’d carried with him for all these years. 

Winona stared at it in wonder, “But… how?”

“Just go to him, please.”

 

****

Pooka’s ears perked up as a knock on the door disturbed his hurried packing. “Go away, Spock.” The door opened anyways, “I said-” but he couldn’t finish, as it definitely was not Spock who was standing in the doorway. It was the Queen. “…I’m so sorry, I thought you were-”

“I know perfectly well who you thought I was.” She entered the room slowly, looking him and down. “Who exactly are you?”

Jim sighed, “Well, before all this, I was hoping you could tell me. I just want to know who I am and if I belong to a family…”

Winona smiled sadly, “Well, they did a good job picking you. You look the most like my James of all the men I’ve seen yet.” 

“I’m sorry to have wasted your time,” Jim said sincerely. She nodded and passed him to leave. Jim caught a strange smell, “Peppermint?”

“An oil for my hands.”

The memory felt warm and faint, “I remember… I spilled some once. Dad was so mad. It got all over his favourite jacket and we could never get the smell out.” He found himself twirling his necklace pendant in his hand. 

Winona had sat on the edge of the bed. “What is that?” She asked, pointing at his hand.

“Oh, I’ve always had it. They found me with it on,” he took it off over his head and handed it to her to look at. 

Her eyes gleamed as she pulled something small and shiny out of her bag. Jim felt his breath stop. “Is that? … my starship?” She pressed the pendant to the model and the melody filled the air and Jim’s heart. He blinked rapidly, so scared to be hopeful, even now. “Mother?”

“Oh James, it’s you.” She threw her arms around him and they cried, joyful to have found one another and sorrowful that they were the only ones left. 

 

**** 

When Winona did not come back out of the residence, Spock knew that she had seen the truth. Jim had found his family. And now it was time for him to leave. He allowed himself an illogical moment of looking up at Jim’s window before pressing his fingertips to his lips and doing something he’d seen his mother do once but never thought he would do himself… ‘blowing a kiss’. 

The next day the Queen had requested his presence. She was sitting behind her desk serenely. He stood at parade rest, awaiting whatever punishment she felt was fit. 

“Though I’m not sure I approve of your methods, I find I am glad of your tenacity Mister Spock.”

He felt a brow rise, “Your highness?”

“Thanks to you and your friend Doctor McCoy, I now have my son back. There is nothing in the galaxy that would convey my thanks, but you are welcome to the credit reward, or whatever else you may want. A captaincy perhaps?”

“No, your highness. I do not require a reward.”

“You’re sure?” She looked surprised. “Your companion also refused the credits but he did appreciate a bit of help with his daughter’s custody case. You’re sure there’s nothing you want?”

Spock inclined his head, “Unfortunately, nothing you can give.”

Winona gave him a shrewd look, getting up from behind her desk. “Jim and I talked until late last night. He told me about everything he remembers.” She leaned against the front of the desk, tilting her head, “You were the boy, weren’t you.” Spock said nothing, just nodding his head once in answer. “And yet you want no reward… why the change of mind?”

He found he could not meet her eyes. He merely whispered a thought before turning to leave, “It was more a change of heart.”

 

On the stairs he ran into Jim. The ache in his chest returned. He bowed, “I am glad you found what you were looking for.”

Jim looked him up and down, “I’m glad you did too.”

“Goodbye Ji- your highness,” Spock corrected himself, ignoring Jim’s flinch. 

Outside the palace he met up with McCoy. “Well, I’m off to see Joanna so I guess this is goodbye until next semester.” He laid a hand on his shoulder and gave Spock a look, “Spock, I think you’re making a mistake.”

“No, Leonard. I cannot stay. I do not belong here.”

 

****

There was a ball being held in his honour. But Jim found himself hiding behind the curtains out of sight. Scanning the crowd without thinking about why.

“He’s not there.”

“I know he’s n-” he turned to find his mother. “I mean… who’s not there?”

Winona just smiled knowingly, “A remarkable young Vulcan who found a miniature starship.”

“Oh, he’s probably off with Bones spending their reward credits,” Jim grumbled, hating how much it hurt to think that. That’s when what his mother had said, sunk in. “Wait… _Spock_  found the starship?”

She smiled sadly, “There was only one Vulcan family on board the Kelvin. The Vulcan Ambassador to Terra, his wife and their son. And only one Vulcan escaped alive.” Jim let his breath out slowly. Spock was the boy from the ship. The one who’d held his hand and made him feel safe. The one who’d saved him. And because of that, Spock had lost his family too. He wasn’t the only one who had grown up alone, searching for belonging. His mother watched him quietly as he remained behind the curtain, feeling like the lights were too bright. “Is this really what you want?”

Jim turned his head sharply, “Of course! I finally know who I am, and I found _you_ .”

She took his hands in hers, “And you will always have me. But is it enough?” Jim tilted his head, not understanding what she was saying. “Neither of them took the credits.” The air was sucked out of Jim’s lungs. _What_ . “All you ever wanted was to join me in Starfleet.” Her eyes glimmered with memories. “The world doesn’t need another ruler, unless it’s what you want to do. But the universe sure could use another Kirk.”

She patted his cheek and went to enter the ballroom, but before she did, she turned and added, “Whatever you choose, James, we will always have each other.” She winked and disappeared behind the curtain. 

 

****

Spock was waiting to board the train for Starfleet when he reached into his pocket for his ticket and found his fingers brushing the rose from the night before. The one Jim had given him. The ache in his chest sharpened. He pulled it out and brushed the soft petals with his thumb. He was gratified that Jim had found his family, but something tugged at him. Jim had found his belonging… and Spock had too. His heart rate increased by eight beats per minute. He belonged _with Jim_ . He had never been more sure of anything. There were no numbers or probabilities that could articulate this simple feeling.

 

****

Jim was practically running down the hall. He had to get to the train station, _now_ . He couldn’t wait for the rest of his life to start now that he knew what it was going to be. Starfleet, Bones… _and Spock_ . 

He was so focused he almost ran into the man standing in his way. “Oh, sorry sir.”

“Sir?” The man scoffed, “Don’t you recognize your dear old uncle?”

Jim stepped back and looked the man over. His face was vaguely familiar. And he looked like Winona a bit. “… Uncle Frank?”

“There it is!” He clapped Jim on the shoulder just a little too hard. “I knew a good little boy like you wouldn’t forget even after all these years. Without you, things with the Kelvin never would’ve worked out so well. Mind you, I _was_ hoping that no Kirk’s would come back at all, but beggars can’t be choosers.”

Jim’s felt sick to his stomach, “… what are you talking about…”

“Oh Jimmy,” his uncle sneered, “Don’t you remember? How else would I have known what to tell the Klingons if it weren’t for you handing me the information?”

With a rush Jim remembered.  _Let’s play spies, Jimmy! All you have to do is tell me what Mummy and Daddy talk about after I leave. It’ll be a game! You can’t tell anyone because spies never reveal their secrets…_ “No…” His voice was filled with horror. _It was his fault._ His fault that his father and brother were dead. His fault that Spock’s family and countless others had lost their lives. Just like it was his fault on Tarsus. He could’ve saved so many more if he’d just been _enough_. 

“I can make you disappear again, Jimmy, if you don’t help me.” Frank smiled wickedly, “There’s no one to save you now.”

“Wanna bet?” A fist came out of nowhere and connected with a crack to the side of Frank’s face. He fell heavily to the ground, knocked out cold. 

“Bones?” Jim’s brain was still playing catch up. “What are you doing here?” 

“Saving your ass apparently. Spock’s got good instincts. He comm-ed me telling me to get here as soon as I could. He should be h-” Spock appeared as if by magic at Jim’s side. 

“Spock!” Jim couldn’t keep from grasping his arm in joy. Spock’s eyes gazed at him warmly. 

“We can do the mushy stuff later boys,” McCoy grumbled. “Now what are we going to do with Uncle Creepo here?”

They decided on tying him up with a nearby curtain sash and McCoy would guard him while Jim and Spock went to tell Winona. They were concerned that Frank might have associates but as there was only the three of them, someone was going to have to be alone and both McCoy and Spock insisted that Jim have someone with him. Jim rolled his eyes but was touched at their care. 

Winona was horrified, but admitted that they had suspected a threat close to the family for some time and had been trying to obtain concrete proof. Frank was taken away safely and a thorough search of his residence proved that despite not being caught for so long, his network of associates was easy to trace now that they knew where to look. 

At the end of the day Jim found himself sitting on a balcony high above the palace gardens. He felt numb after everything that had happened. 

“Jim?” he felt Spock sit down beside him. 

“Hey,” Jim’s voice scratched at his throat. Spock offered him his hand, palm up. Jim knew he was offering comfort and calm. But he didn’t deserve that. He looked at Spock helplessly, eyes stinging. 

“Leonard informed me of what your Uncle said to you.” Jim’s heart lurched. “Jim… it is not your fault.” Tears finally fell, slipping down his cheeks silently. “You were a child, and he was a trusted family member.” Jim felt a cool hand slip over his clenched fist, Spock’s familiar mind brushing the edges of his. He couldn’t believe he’d forgotten him, how could he have forgotten _this_. This warm safety that had surrounded him as they hid inside the walls of the Kelvin and did again now as they sat together in the night air. He leaned his head on Spock’s shoulder and let it all out. 

“I’m so sorry, Spock. I’m sorry your family didn’t make it. I’m sorry you saved me instead.”

Spock was silent for a moment, his hand tracing patterns over Jim’s hand until he finally turned it palm up to interlace their fingers. “I could not sleep. So I went to the observation deck to look at the stars.” He fell quiet and Jim squeezed his hand gently. Spock continued so softly that Jim could barely hear him. “It is my fear that when the alarms went off, they died searching for me when they could have escaped.”

“Oh Spock,” he pulled back slightly to see tears running down Spock’s cheeks. He gathered him into his arms and they held each other. Each gently working away at the guilt clouding the others mind. Eventually they had calmed down and were breathing steadily in sync. Jim ran his thumb over Spock’s cheek, “I thought you were going back to Starfleet.”

“I was.”

“And you didn’t take the credits?”

“I could not.”

“Why?” he breathed.

“Because I…” Spock’s eyes met Jim’s and he knew. Leaning forwards their lips met. Soft and sincere. This was where they were both meant to be. 

 

****

Spock and McCoy waited outside the office. “Don’t worry Spock, they’ll love him.”

“Vulcans do not worry, Doctor.”

“Don’t worry my ass. And how many times do I have to tell you that it’s Leonard?”

“As we are back at the academy, I believe Doctor to be the more appropriate form of address.”

“Good god man-” He was cut off as Jim strutted out of Pike’s office. His red cadet uniform looking especially sharp. 

“Looks like you guys are stuck with me,” he grinned. 

“I think that’s a punishment we’re willing to bear,” McCoy smacked Jim on the shoulder. 

Jim’s hand found Spock’s and received a reassuring squeeze. “I am most pleased,” Spock almost smiled. 

“Ugh, though this punishment, I did not agree to. You boys need to keep the mushy stuff to the bedroom.”

Jim laughed as they crossed the campus together. He had found his family. One royal, and the other in an unlikely couple of Starfleet officers and a cat.

 

****

“Well, he’s been accepted.”

“Why am I not surprised,” Winona smiled at Pike over the video comm. 

“Seems like a perfect ending,” he grinned.

“No,” Winona sighed, “It’s a perfect beginning.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoyed! i wrote this in the span of about 3 days so apologies for any mistakes <3


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